Reasons why I will never visit Australia

I’m sure it’s a great country. I’m sure the people are great and the food is fantastic. But I’ve found more than one reason why my candy ass will never visit that great place down under.

That’s a earth worm. Just a normal earth worm in the land down under.

Nope. No way.

OF COURSE! Who doesn’t wanna sit Oceanside with a croc?

Or surf with a great white?

Relax, play a round of golf and hope the shark doesn’t eat your golf ball.


That's cool- just rollin in the streets.


I’m not getting off the plane.

I’m not even getting on the plane.

I won’t step foot in the water.

Just camp out in my hotel room.

Screw you. Nope. Not even buying a ticket. Don’t even suggest it.

Yet they ban pit bulls in the land down under?

“Pit bull terriers are to be banned in Australia’s biggest states after a series of vicious dog attacks put people in hospital. New South Wales premier Bob Carr on Tuesday branded the breed “killing machines on leashes” that should be exterminated.”

Although- when searching multiple sources, pit bulls don’t even make the list for the top killers in the land down under.


Pit bulls still didn’t make the list.

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